Behavioral changes
What do you do when you have a child who is acting like nice kiddo one moment and as soon as a friend comes into the room, he acts like a complete neanderthal? I don't get it. I don't understand how the mere presence of one child can change the behavior of mine so drastically that we can go from a fun filled morning to a complete breakdown and have to leave the situation. What do you do if it's a good friend? What do you do if it's a good kid? How can you change the behavior of a 2 1/2 year old when he sees a different behavior being exhibited by another? And what is acceptable and what isn't?
It's so bizarre to see how his temperament and actions have changed over the course of the past month or so. Everyone see's it. It's gentler and calmer and plays nicely for the most part...so to see his behavior change from the nice boy I've molded over the past few weeks to crazy toddler boy all within 5 minutes of a friend walking in, is so discouraging.
Maybe I'm being too strict. Maybe I expect too much for my very active little boy. I don't know. How do I teach Asher that one child's behavior may be OK in their household, but in our household it isn't? Can a 2 1/2 year old even comprehend that? I never realized how difficult being a parent really is. It's one thing to feed and clothe and love a child, but to teach him right from wrong and self-control and what is acceptable and non-acceptable behavior is so hard. I never knew that months of teaching your child something could be taken away with one afternoon playing with the wrong influence. And I'm not even saying this child is a bad influence...I'm just starting to notice how differently, in a bad way, Asher acts when they play together. And I don't want to separate them. But how do I rectify the issue? How do I teach Asher that he can play with his friend but not emulate him?
I don't want a perfect child. I just want him to be a child. I want him to enjoy his childhood and never feel pressured. I've never boast about how talented or smart my child is. I think that sets them up for failure and it drives wedges between friends. I don't need to know how many colors your child knows or that they can count...every one learns things at different stages. Your child isn't brilliant. Face it, he's a normal child. I'm not going to push my child into school or sports or anything just because someone else thinks I should. I just want him to enjoy his childhood, his innocence. I'm a pretty laid back mom. But I'm not OK with him acting like a neanderthal either. Even at 2 1/2. I've realized lately that with him, I really need to be more strict in the discipline department because I can see him pushing his boundaries and testing me. When I ask him to come, he walks the other way. And I see other kids doing this too. Older kids...and I've realized, that will be Asher of I don't stop this behavior now. But it's so hard. He's still such a young little boy. How much do you push? How much should I expect. I have a very energetic child...can I expect him to drop everything and come to me when I call? I don't think so...but how do I find the middle ground and how do I separate one child's actions from my child's?
Sorry, so many questions. I guess I just have a ton on my mind and I needed to mentally vomit them all out here. I love being a parent. I love being a parent to Asher. But man it's hard. Trying to make the best choices for your children while making your household a safe and happy haven is hard. I now fully understand mama guilt!
It's so bizarre to see how his temperament and actions have changed over the course of the past month or so. Everyone see's it. It's gentler and calmer and plays nicely for the most part...so to see his behavior change from the nice boy I've molded over the past few weeks to crazy toddler boy all within 5 minutes of a friend walking in, is so discouraging.
Maybe I'm being too strict. Maybe I expect too much for my very active little boy. I don't know. How do I teach Asher that one child's behavior may be OK in their household, but in our household it isn't? Can a 2 1/2 year old even comprehend that? I never realized how difficult being a parent really is. It's one thing to feed and clothe and love a child, but to teach him right from wrong and self-control and what is acceptable and non-acceptable behavior is so hard. I never knew that months of teaching your child something could be taken away with one afternoon playing with the wrong influence. And I'm not even saying this child is a bad influence...I'm just starting to notice how differently, in a bad way, Asher acts when they play together. And I don't want to separate them. But how do I rectify the issue? How do I teach Asher that he can play with his friend but not emulate him?
I don't want a perfect child. I just want him to be a child. I want him to enjoy his childhood and never feel pressured. I've never boast about how talented or smart my child is. I think that sets them up for failure and it drives wedges between friends. I don't need to know how many colors your child knows or that they can count...every one learns things at different stages. Your child isn't brilliant. Face it, he's a normal child. I'm not going to push my child into school or sports or anything just because someone else thinks I should. I just want him to enjoy his childhood, his innocence. I'm a pretty laid back mom. But I'm not OK with him acting like a neanderthal either. Even at 2 1/2. I've realized lately that with him, I really need to be more strict in the discipline department because I can see him pushing his boundaries and testing me. When I ask him to come, he walks the other way. And I see other kids doing this too. Older kids...and I've realized, that will be Asher of I don't stop this behavior now. But it's so hard. He's still such a young little boy. How much do you push? How much should I expect. I have a very energetic child...can I expect him to drop everything and come to me when I call? I don't think so...but how do I find the middle ground and how do I separate one child's actions from my child's?
Sorry, so many questions. I guess I just have a ton on my mind and I needed to mentally vomit them all out here. I love being a parent. I love being a parent to Asher. But man it's hard. Trying to make the best choices for your children while making your household a safe and happy haven is hard. I now fully understand mama guilt!
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