i'm exhausted. i just can't seem to get my wits about me. the exhaustion didn't come on so quickly with Jorai. i get about 10 hours of sleep a night and still wake up exhausted. it's absolutely amazing how quickly my body has been changing. it's so cool. i find that God's creation of life is so far beyond my comprehension. to think that this crazy swimmy thing can connect with a tiny egg to create life, and then it all happens within my body. the food i eat, the exercise i exert, the drink i take, everything i do helps support this life growing within me. how cool is that?!
i still get scared a bit. every twinge takes my thoughts instantly to thinking i'm losing the baby. but for the majority, i just feel blessed. someone asked me the other day if we thought we were having a boy or girl, and to tell you the truth, i hadn't even thought of it. i was just so happy to have a child growing within me. there's life growing again within me. it feels so good to feel this way again. i can't describe it other than to say how much of a blessing it is. as much as it still kills me to know that Jorai was taken from us, there is joy that has filled the emptiness, knowing the God has chosen to bless us again.
i still get scared a bit. every twinge takes my thoughts instantly to thinking i'm losing the baby. but for the majority, i just feel blessed. someone asked me the other day if we thought we were having a boy or girl, and to tell you the truth, i hadn't even thought of it. i was just so happy to have a child growing within me. there's life growing again within me. it feels so good to feel this way again. i can't describe it other than to say how much of a blessing it is. as much as it still kills me to know that Jorai was taken from us, there is joy that has filled the emptiness, knowing the God has chosen to bless us again.
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