tired of sharing my life

for the most part, i have a huge problem sharing my life and faith with my family members and some of my non-believing friends. i feel as if they place me under a magnifying glass. they attack me and make fun of my beliefs. so i shy away. i do have unbelieving friends that accept me. which is awesome. i can tell them anything. they are here for me as i am for them and i never feel uncomfortable around them. they are truly a Godsend.

but it's all the others, especially my family, that's hard. earlier this year my dad sent out an email to family members calling those who believe in creation, stupid. his brother and sister-in-law, me and steve all believe in creation. why would a person do that? my aunt awas so hurt by i, she emailed me to ask why my father would say such a thing. this is what i was born into. and i guess, this is one reason i have a hard time sharing my faith. i know how my family believes. i know how they treat me. when i first became i believer, i was the laughing stock of the family. so i got a pretty tough skin, but i also learned not to share things.

when riverbrew was in the news, i thought, wow! this is an opportunity to share with my family that i may be a believer, but i attend a very progressive, cool church. my dad and brother brew and i have some friends that brew, so i thought it would be something they could relate too. i still haven't heard back from my folks...but i did hear back from a friend. a believing friend no less. i am still in shock and have no words for his email. i'm baffled how someone can be so hipocritical and judgmental...i'm going to post it because i want to share with you a sample of what i deal with when i try to share my faith and life with many people in my life. this makes me really sad.

I know tooo many alcoholics to appreciate this ministry in the least.I fail to see how your people can deal with alcoholic family issues when they approve of drinking the stuff. It is a real turn around that will bite them in the ass eventually. What next. Cleaner meth labs education at the prayer meeting??I would however like to see the church running grow rooms for pot. A very good medical research lab run by a church might bring it into the proper light as a viable medicine. There is tons of research supporting med. marijuana in so many different applications from cancer to glaucoma to dietary help to arthritis. I can't think of any med. uses for alcohol but can point out the cost in health care to all of us because of alcohol. Also the continuing destruction of all the native American tribes. Of course the Christians brought measles and cultural destruction to the Indians a long time ago so I guess this along their usual lines of operation. JUST SAY NO TO DRUGS> How can you tell your children that but o.k. a drug called alcohol. Play with fire and you're gonna get burned kim. Don't take a rocket scientist to understand that principle. WHat are you gonna say to a little kid who's been beat to hell by her alcohlic mother or father? ??" I guess you could say I'm not for this idea in anyway form or fashion. It sorta reminds me of the Children of God cult and their striptease clubs in Denver in the 70'S. The attitude was "what ever brings people to the Lord." Maybe your church could use that idea too! You gals could take turns drinking holy beer and dancing nekkid! You will get a lot of attention then and many will be exposed to the Word! Just a suggestion.

i hate hypocrisy. i hate judgement. i hate when people get on their high horses and judge something you're doing as they sit in the confides of their own house and sin. i know this person very well. and as he looks into my life to point out my 'flaws', he's sitting on a mountain of his own. i'm not frustrated that he disagrees with this ministry. disagree away, but don't attack me, my faith of my church for 1 thing you disagree with. and don't tell me that drinking a beer is dreadful, yet promoting pot is brilliant.

i'm so tired of this world. i'm so tired of being beaten down. one beating after another seems to be my life these days. i'm just so tired.