what not to say to a pregnant woman
last night, after our wet t-shirt walk-a-thon, we noticed one of our neighbors out. she's one that's nice but we just really don't have much in common with and they usually stick to their own thing. but she was out with her little yippee dog, so we stopped over to say hello. and of course the conversation revolved around me and the fact that i hadn't delivered yet. she quickly added how her friend had an 8 pound baby and how she hopes i don't have such a big baby.
8 pounds...big? and i though 8 pounds was normal. i was over 9. my brother was over 10...steve was over 8. i've pretty much realized that our baby will be at least 8, probably 9+ and i'm ok with that. there's nothing i can do about it. and usually bigger babies seem more content, so that's ok.
but what did neighbor lady say? 'wow, that will hurt! i sure hope your baby's not that big!'.
wow, that will hurt? that's what you think you should say to someone just about ready to deliver? seriously? not that i didn't already know that...but really?
why do people feel they need to tell you about the horror stories or how much it will hurt or how long they went past their due date or how hot the summer will be? why can't they talk about the joys of pregnancy or just how exciting it all is? it all gets so predictable. i can't tell you how many times i've heard the stories or how rude people can be. my mom-in-law actually told me a few weeks ago how filled out my face looked. i know she didn't mean to make me feel like crap, but come on...just tell me how fat i look. i mean, it's not like i don't see myself ballooning up every time i look in the mirror. do i really need people to point out me how large i actually am?
i mean, i know this process will hurt, i know i'll gain weight. you'd have to be a bit off your rocker to think there would be no pain or weight involved...seeing what's happening and all...but come on. i would never walk up to someone, pregnant or not and tell them how chunky they're getting or if they have some medical condition, remind them how painful it'll be. it's just so crazy!
and the thing that really makes me wonder about people who choose to say these comments, is are they crazy themselves? do they not understand the emotional severity of a pregnant woman? i could literally snap you head off some days with the amount of hormones pumping through my veins. these people either have some major balls to try and pick on me, or they're simply totally clueless.
so in review...be kind to pregnant women. they're emotional basket cases. somethings are ok to say...but
8 pounds...big? and i though 8 pounds was normal. i was over 9. my brother was over 10...steve was over 8. i've pretty much realized that our baby will be at least 8, probably 9+ and i'm ok with that. there's nothing i can do about it. and usually bigger babies seem more content, so that's ok.
but what did neighbor lady say? 'wow, that will hurt! i sure hope your baby's not that big!'.
wow, that will hurt? that's what you think you should say to someone just about ready to deliver? seriously? not that i didn't already know that...but really?
why do people feel they need to tell you about the horror stories or how much it will hurt or how long they went past their due date or how hot the summer will be? why can't they talk about the joys of pregnancy or just how exciting it all is? it all gets so predictable. i can't tell you how many times i've heard the stories or how rude people can be. my mom-in-law actually told me a few weeks ago how filled out my face looked. i know she didn't mean to make me feel like crap, but come on...just tell me how fat i look. i mean, it's not like i don't see myself ballooning up every time i look in the mirror. do i really need people to point out me how large i actually am?
i mean, i know this process will hurt, i know i'll gain weight. you'd have to be a bit off your rocker to think there would be no pain or weight involved...seeing what's happening and all...but come on. i would never walk up to someone, pregnant or not and tell them how chunky they're getting or if they have some medical condition, remind them how painful it'll be. it's just so crazy!
and the thing that really makes me wonder about people who choose to say these comments, is are they crazy themselves? do they not understand the emotional severity of a pregnant woman? i could literally snap you head off some days with the amount of hormones pumping through my veins. these people either have some major balls to try and pick on me, or they're simply totally clueless.
so in review...be kind to pregnant women. they're emotional basket cases. somethings are ok to say...but
- 'wow! that will hurt' or
- 'are you having twins?' unless you are having twins...but asking the twins question is kind like asking the 'are you pregnant? question...unless you know for sure, don't ask it. or
- 'you're face has really filled out!'
Comments
Kix will make his/her appearance soon. That's all you should focus on. Not what other people say, but what you tell yourself is what is important. Childbirth is a beautiful, magical thing.
Try some saying some of these things over and over:
My mind and body are strong and can handle a labor of any kind.
I trust my body to know how to birth this child.
Only I can give birth to this baby and I accept responsibility for that challenge.
Babies are born when they are ready, not when doctors, midwives or anyone else decides.
My body is indeed beautifully and wonderfully made.
You can do this Kim! I'm confident of that!
I'm praying your baby will come soon and arrive safely into your arms!!!
Jen