an end to this day

steve is finally home. i was starting to go wacky. i love my son and i'm so glad i stay home with him, but there are times i want to lock myself in the bathroom and turn on the shower so i don't hear him cry. and he's a great baby! but on a day like today with very little sleep and him nursing every hour and a half or so, i'm was starting to lose it.

it's been one of those days where i never got dressed, until i broke down to take him on a walk, i brushed my hair but it still looks like butt, my teeth are nasty, every time i got the chance to make something to eat by the time it was done, asher was wailing, i'm exhausted, emotional and wanting some adult interaction but was too exhausted to leave the house. in fact right before steve came home someone rang the doorbell and i got so excited because i thought it might be a friend or neighbor, but it was some holt football player trying to sell me something to raise money. what a bummer!

but now steve's home and i get to work on my message and blog and maybe brush my teeth before going to bed...which i'm dreading if it's anything like last night. i hope i get some adult interaction tonight as well. a good conversation would be wonderful. it's so hard to even talk at times when you have a 10 week old child in your house. i miss talking and laughing with my husband!!

days' like this make me seriously think about having another child. i don't know if i could do it. if i had a day like this and had a 2-3 year old to take care of. oye! this stay at home mom thing is tough stuff. amazingly wonderful and fulfilling and i wouldn't change it for the world, but it's tough stuff! i think it's gotta be the hardest job out there.

steve's outside with asher. the house is quiet. i'm alone. it's the first time today i feel relaxed. i hope tonight is calm and asher sleeps better and i hope tomorrow we can get out and enjoy the day.

Comments

ShannaKay said…
i'm here for you in the prayer world anyway. those days are tough....loving you through them :)
Katie said…
I know those days... they make you feel like an ungrateful heel - but the truth is that it's just HARD. It's wonderful and fulfilling and a precious, precious gift. But it's stinking hard.
As one sometimes-unwashed mama to another... give me a call sometime when you feel that way and we can sit with our 2 screaming babes together and try to converse over the din. :)

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