bummed

my son doesn't want anything to do with me tonight. i'm crushed. i love our nighttime routine. i look forward to it all day. tonight i took a bath with him and then steve and i changed him and put him in his pj's. but as soon as i went to nurse him he went ballistic. that was around 7:20. it's 8:10 now and he's still not down. he won't nurse, he'll fuss with steve but as soon as i touch him, he goes crazy. crazy! wailing crazy. as if i'm hurting him.

i'm crushed. i know i shouldn't take it personal, but i am. i'm usually the one that can calm him down but tonight, i'm the last person he wants to see, smell, touch or be with. i'm sad.

i have a feeling that tonight will be a long, long night.