a drive

in an attempt to get my son to nap today i went on a drive. an hour and 15 minutes drive. it worked. i'm glad gas prices are so low right now. i felt bad to drive to nowhere and beyond, but i had to. my wits were shot. 2 days of very scant naps makes mama and baby boy very unhappy campers. last nights bed time was horrible. a screaming fest began with the refusal to nurse and almost 40 minutes of blood curdling screams of anger. when i finally got him to sleep with a combination of rocking him in the bathroom with the shower blazing, he was gasping for breath. i've heard children do this. i've done this when the tears and sobs came so hard that i could barely breathe. but to hear my son do it was excruciating. and to hear him do it in his sleep was a killer. oh yeah, and he's tearing now too. so to see his eyelashes wet with tears was so hard.

i don't want another replay of last night. i want him to be happy and content. not screaming and bawling and pissed off at the world. so, we rode. we rode to nap-land and it was a wonderful trip. he woke about 3-4 times for a few moments, but all in all, he slept 1 hour and 45 minutes...30 of them where in the garage.

i simply hope that he's happy tonight and nurses, last night was a bit painful for not nursing for almost 7 hours! i would so like to know why some days he sleeps so wonderfully and other...well..not so much.