child loss resources
to write their names in the sand has developed a new website for families who have lost a child. they polled families who have lost children on what they wished they knew about or did with their child in their last moments with them. they wanted to make a brief and easy website that listed some things you can do to remember and honor your precious baby and list child loss resources.
there are so many things that i wish we did in the few brief hours we were with Jorai. i wish we bathed her. i wish we took more pictures, especially of her naked body. there are so many things i wonder about her. did she have our birthmarks, our tall second toe, steve's mole...so many things. i wish we had contacted now i lay me down to sleep. suzanne asked if we wanted her to contact them for us and for some reason we chose not to. dumb. i wish more of my family and friends held her. i wish she touched more of my friends lives with her physical being. i wish we took her outside so the sun could kiss her cool skin. i wish her blanket, that now wraps up me and asher at night, touched her skin. i wish that the only clothes that touched her, weren't stained with blood. i could go on and on. and i think that even if i changed that entire day and did all the things i wish i did, i would still regret our moments. we had such a short time with her and that day was so raw, so unreal and heart breaking, that nothing could have been 'right'.
i also think that mama's who have lost our precious children need to help others. as hard as it is to see another go through a loss just like yours, i think it's what God has called us to do. for only do we truly know the pain, the darkness, the guttural turmoil and ache that will forever haunt us. for as joy filled and blessed as i am with a beautiful son filling my life with laughter and love, just last night i ached for my daughter. i laid in bed and recounted the day i lost her. out of nowhere these feelings and memories haunt me. and i know now, more that ever, that they will forever haunt me.
so, today when i saw that this website had been launched, i realized that my memories, as heartbreaking as they are, are a reminder to me to be an advocate for others who are feeling the same heartache. whispered support is such a marvelous idea. there are other sites out there that list what you can do to memorialize, honor and remember your child, but there's something special about this site. maybe because it's put together by mama's who have lost their children and who have gone to other mama's to ask for their support and ideas. i don't know. it's just different. i think all hospitals should download the letter and resources and i think we should all bookmark this site in the unfortunate event that someone we know, loses their child.
there are so many things that i wish we did in the few brief hours we were with Jorai. i wish we bathed her. i wish we took more pictures, especially of her naked body. there are so many things i wonder about her. did she have our birthmarks, our tall second toe, steve's mole...so many things. i wish we had contacted now i lay me down to sleep. suzanne asked if we wanted her to contact them for us and for some reason we chose not to. dumb. i wish more of my family and friends held her. i wish she touched more of my friends lives with her physical being. i wish we took her outside so the sun could kiss her cool skin. i wish her blanket, that now wraps up me and asher at night, touched her skin. i wish that the only clothes that touched her, weren't stained with blood. i could go on and on. and i think that even if i changed that entire day and did all the things i wish i did, i would still regret our moments. we had such a short time with her and that day was so raw, so unreal and heart breaking, that nothing could have been 'right'.
i also think that mama's who have lost our precious children need to help others. as hard as it is to see another go through a loss just like yours, i think it's what God has called us to do. for only do we truly know the pain, the darkness, the guttural turmoil and ache that will forever haunt us. for as joy filled and blessed as i am with a beautiful son filling my life with laughter and love, just last night i ached for my daughter. i laid in bed and recounted the day i lost her. out of nowhere these feelings and memories haunt me. and i know now, more that ever, that they will forever haunt me.
so, today when i saw that this website had been launched, i realized that my memories, as heartbreaking as they are, are a reminder to me to be an advocate for others who are feeling the same heartache. whispered support is such a marvelous idea. there are other sites out there that list what you can do to memorialize, honor and remember your child, but there's something special about this site. maybe because it's put together by mama's who have lost their children and who have gone to other mama's to ask for their support and ideas. i don't know. it's just different. i think all hospitals should download the letter and resources and i think we should all bookmark this site in the unfortunate event that someone we know, loses their child.
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