Christmas without my daughters.
It's almost Christmas day. It's 9 minutes away. Tomorrow morning I should be celebrating with my 3 children. But instead, there will be only 1. Upstairs lies my sweet miracle baby boy, whom I love so very much. But my 2 beautiful girls are no where to be seen. I know they're whooping it up in Heaven for one kick ass birthday party, but I'd rather them here. Selfishly, I just want them here.
I was watching all the families tonight at church. Brothers and sisters. Some teasing one another, some poking at each other and some snuggling up with one another. I remember my childhood Christmas' with my 2 older brothers. They are such fond memories. I loved my brothers so. I looked up to them and always wanted to be close to them. I keep wondering if Asher will ever have that. That bond of a sibling. The thought of my inability to give him that is overwhelming at times.
well...it's midnight. It's Christmas morning. Merry Christmas Jorai. Merry Christmas Selah. We have your stockings stuffed down here on earth. Your memories are here with us, as they'll always be. We'll be celebrating Christmas as a family for the first time. I'll make Christmas breakfast with Ula-cocka bread and we'll do stockings and presents. You'll be missed my sweet girls. You'll always be missed. I love you both so much. My only wish was that I could feel your arms around me now and smell the sweetness of your skin and hair. I miss you. I love you. Always and forever.
I was watching all the families tonight at church. Brothers and sisters. Some teasing one another, some poking at each other and some snuggling up with one another. I remember my childhood Christmas' with my 2 older brothers. They are such fond memories. I loved my brothers so. I looked up to them and always wanted to be close to them. I keep wondering if Asher will ever have that. That bond of a sibling. The thought of my inability to give him that is overwhelming at times.
well...it's midnight. It's Christmas morning. Merry Christmas Jorai. Merry Christmas Selah. We have your stockings stuffed down here on earth. Your memories are here with us, as they'll always be. We'll be celebrating Christmas as a family for the first time. I'll make Christmas breakfast with Ula-cocka bread and we'll do stockings and presents. You'll be missed my sweet girls. You'll always be missed. I love you both so much. My only wish was that I could feel your arms around me now and smell the sweetness of your skin and hair. I miss you. I love you. Always and forever.
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