Selah's genetic results

We got nothing. We're back to square one. Nothing grew...whatever that means...so we have no answers to why Selah passed. My doctor called to tell us the news and she said that the form stated the they usually never get results with stillborn children since they need living tissue for the growth. Which makes sense...but I wish I knew that in advance, so I wouldn't have been placing so much on these results.

She wants us to hold out hope for our test on February 4th. I'm trying to remain positive...but what if we don't get a diagnosis? What if everything comes back normal? Should we even try again? Not knowing what our choices are, is so frustrating. I just want something tangible to hold onto. Some type of truth.

Every where I look I see children with siblings. I'm surrounded by them. And though it makes me happy, it also makes me sad. There's a huge possibility that Asher will never have a living sibling. He'll never have what his friends have. He'll never have that close bond that a person shares with their sibling. I want so much to give that to him. Although I'd love to have another child...the want is more for Asher to have a sibling...and that's hard. I may never be able to give him that.

I just can't wait to get some answers...if there are any.